2 am. And I’m awake. Wide awake. Lying in bed and wrestling with my thoughts. Somehow in the darkness of night it is easier for worry and fear to take hold. Whether it be financial or health worries or work stress, the thoughts can feel overpowering. Waking the next morning, the light of day makes them easier to shake off, makes them insignificant and ridiculous even. The concerns are often completely unfounded and extreme. But at night it’s an overwhelming reality.
For me, last night, it was thoughts on parenting – thoughts of failing – am I doing a good job, could I be doing more or things better? It was a train of thought that was proving hard to disembark from. That is until the words from 2 Corinthians drifted across my mind – take captive every thought, take captive every thought.
“We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ. ” (2 Corinthians 10:5)
Even in the middle of the night, in the weird wakefulness that I had found myself in, I had a choice over what I could think about. I had a choice as to whether to let the negative thoughts I was having take root or I could take control and rid myself of them. I didn’t have to succumb to the thoughts that were flooding into my mind. And I know I’m not the only one – it’s an important enough issue to appear in the Bible! And in the Bible we find a solution…
Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable–if anything is excellent or praiseworthy–think about such things. (Philippians 4:8)
In other words what I call “happy thoughts”! It was time to change the track, well actually the train! So thoughts of the fun times ahead, of sunny beaches and hot pools, of hot air balloons and blue skies and lollipops…! And the grace of God as I parent.